I will be at Town Square tonight for two different events, join me if you want to bask in my fabulousity or adequataqaticism, your choice.

Something I am not good at and hate is having to kowtow to a-holes just so they won't spread lies and put you in their path of retardation.

I don't think I'll ever get back. The last 30 miles are killer.

Finally heading home, babies. See you soon

I met Bryan Singer today & had a complete nerdgasm looking at all his props. He even let me wear a pair of Hugh Jackman's prop claws.

I love you all so much!!! Never thought I would say "I can't wait to go back to Vegas where life is normal!"

Horrible sounds to wake up to: submarine alarm & the Operation buzzer.

Why is it when I need to talk to someone, nobody is awake?

I love the gays... but I hate fags... and Big Joe, you are a complete fag and I really do not like you. You are full of hate and mean words.

I do not endorse the @RamadaWeHo. Terrible staff, horrible "wi-fi" and outrageous parking fees. The valet guys are the only pleasant thing.

I'm listening to the tv as I work and heard an ad for Trojan BareSkin condoms. I was think BEAR SKIN and was much puzzled. :(

Ok LA, what do you have in store for me?

The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the US Redneck Special Forces (USRSF). These southern boys will be dropped in Afghanistan knowing only these facts about terrorists.1.The season opened today. 2. There is no limit. 3. They taste just like chicken. 4. They dont like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus. 5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt. The Pentagon expects the problem in Afghanistan to be over by Monday

Curtis and I have to drink in my room on a Saturday night in WeHo since neither of us have a chance. We are as good as it gets for each other.

Woo Hoo. Finally on my way. Watch Out WeHo!

At the vet and I hear this horrible screeching and am thinking "poor kitty". I hope it's not Gir since she never makes that noise. I will be mad

I really hope the @USPS worker is enjoying my movies. It warms my heart knowing that you are watching them while I make a claim.

Oh courthouse, you are so entertaining.

Off to LA Saturday through Wednesday. It's going to be a fun time... Jealous much?

Musing on the idea of setting someone on fire doesn't mean you REALLY want to set them on fire, it's just the thought of it that makes you happy. But only for a second, then you feel bad, but that second could be a lot of fun!

Wouldn't it just rock and roll if liking someone meant they had to like you back? Of course that would be in a different universe and something else would probably suck.

WARNING- If you see a link that offers free tracks from NickleBack's new album* do not click on it ! * It goes to a site that offers free tracks from NickleBack's new album. REPOST (Thanks Rich!)

Suck it, Trebek.

Poor, rich Taylor Lautner. No matter what role he takes, he's always going to be that "werewolf asshole from the gay vamp movie".

Politicians and Diapers need to be changed regularly....often for the same reason.

I love you thunder, lightning and rain!

I need some new headphones or a jack converter to fit my 8-track player.

@lvcourts @legallyunbound Rec'd a Jury Summons w/wrong name. I go to confirm & my ID#, birth and SSN are not in their records. Suggestions? No help from CCC (surprise) to figure out the issue.

Hey there my loyal readers and friends... what are your favorite things to "geek out" on when you get the chance????

What is the over/under of my falling at the skating rink and going to hospital with some sort of emergency? Wonder which one I will break?

We will always remember the lives lost 10 years ago in a senseless act of violence and destruction. The horror of the morning's events and the ongoing coverage in the weeks to follow. BUT, the two memories that remind me of our strength for recovery: @JonStewart giving America a puppy and Rudy Guliani on the SNL season premiere.

Holy Hell that is a wicked rain and dust storm. Blew my door open

I don't know what Karate Karaoke is but Joker's Wild has it.

Under Age Road Rage....Next on Sick Sad World!!

The Universe is a clever being. My parents moved from Bastrop, TX to SLC last month. Exactly where the raging Texas inferno is causing destruction.

If the words from your mouth or off your keyboard are not the truth why say or post them? Lies & half-truths have a way of being the loudest in a crowd.

I wish daisies came with thorns so you would think twice about destroying the beauty of its gift.

Chilling in bed with my lil Gir as she is all cuddly and purring. She is feeling 200% better than she was one week ago.

Back off, man, I'm a scientist!

"why no, I've never actually smelled my butt-sweat dollar bills."

Sometimes your shallowness is so thorough, it’s almost like depth.

I keep waiting for my "the one" but I think he was that asshole that I flipped off and called a few choice words.

Tonight, there is someone: I love, I miss, I like, I loathe, I pity, I pray they find happiness, I wish would SEE me, I want to hug, I need to forgive, I wish I could forget.

Kiss my front butt!

Broccoli-cheese soup sounds great right about now. Mmmm... yummm