I don't understand the question and I won't respond to it.

There's not a word yet for old friends who've just met. Part heaven, part space, or have I found my place? I'm going to go back there someday.

Gir is out and is ok. She looks so pathetic since she was shaved and all but 2 of her teeth are gone. Thanks for all the love and thoughts!

I want a Taco Bueno nacho salad. Not sure why I am craving that.

My fur baby GIR is going in for surgery today. I'm very sad and nervous. =

WHY IS THERE BACON IN THE SOAP????

Austin Humane Society has lost A/C, its about 110 outside, they are doing free adoptions today & tomorrow, so if you are looking for a furry friend get over there, and spread the word! (repost)

I'm Baaaaaaacccckkkk!

Are you effing kidding me? Another screaming baby on a tiny airplane.

Thunder and lightning storms in Tooele, UT. Awesome backdrop against the mountains.

I have never been so tearful during a movie. Geeze

Seeing "The Help" with my mom. While dad is seeing "that monkey" movie. Ha ha

The Weather Channel said the recent East coast quake was caused by an unknown fault line running under D.C. & through Virginia. It is now being called Obama's Fault, though Obama will say it's really Bush's Fault. Another theory is the founding fathers are rolling over in their graves, but I believe what we all thought was an earthquake was actually the effects of a 14.6 TRILLION dollar check bouncing in Washington.

The Weather Channel said the recent East coast earthquake was caused by an unknown fault line running under D.C. and through Virginia. It is now being called Obama's Fault, though Obama will say it's really Bush's Fault. Another theory is the founding fathers are rolling over in their graves, but I believe what we all thought was an earthquake was actually the effects of a 14.6 TRILLION dollar check bouncing in Washington.

NYC Policemen and Firefighters are not invited to the 10th Ann. of 9/11 at Ground Zero. The mayor claims there isn't room for them. They weren't invited on that day in 2001 either. THEY JUST SHOWED UP AND DID THEIR JOB ! Please re-post if you think they belong more than the Politicians! Anyone able to shed some more info?

I just realized, after my phone died, that I forgot my charger. Eep. Opp. Ork. Oh No..

The day I have a @Delta flight that's on time I will be building a snowman with Satan

Ok @Delta, lets hope this engine is good to go. I'm tired of my plans getting kinked due to your airline.

Oh no. We have to go back to the gate. There is an engine problem. =

See you Vegas fools next week! Jukie out.

THIS JUST IN: It's hot... in Vegas... In August. This is groundbreaking and will never happen again. Please take precaution. ;)

Does anyone here have the last three episodes of Pretty Little Liars on their DVR?

Just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world. She took the midnight train goin' anywhere.

This is great day for the SF couple facing deportation! http://ping.fm/UhLlm

I am spooked. Sitting at my desk working, then I turn in my chair to get some photos and when I get back to my keyboard, there is a dead flower sitting there. No clue where it came from. No one has been in here.

Anyone in Las Vegas know who has ENDLESS wings and beer?

If anyone is bored, I would love a chocolate-cherry milkshake. Just putting it out there!

Spock's stoic badassery and alien sex appeal unexpectedly attracted lots of female viewers and the show's ratings skyrocketed. He is the perfect man: tall, mysterious, brilliant, a bit of an outcast... he's like James Dean and an art history professor all rolled into one pointy-eared package. Thanks CRACKED.

Go to www.TMZ.com for a Live Press Conference on the West Memphis 3.

From the Desk (and sick/twisted mind) of: Tony Stark
Justin Bieber signed on to play young Stark in Iron Man 3 flashback sequences.

Did I die? Am I really dead and this is my Hell?

Tweet from "iamdiddy- never sacrifice who you are just because somebody has a problem with it. be you. always." This from the guy that has 14 names a year.

"There is bitch cuttin' epidemic and I am in the center of this storm."

All this positive energy I put out in the world has come back to me 1000-fold. Thank you universe and @USAA for totally clearing up my debt.

The highlight of my divorce (aside from not being married & taking back my maiden name) is I am still a member of @USAA. This bank rules!

Aside from getting my maiden name back, the only good thing my ex-hubby gave me was access to @USAA! This company rules & other banks drool.

Thanks, Josh Vance, for going to get me mashed potatoes and cajun gravy. You are the bestest in the world.

Well, I did not die overnight. I am still not out of the woods... lol. How much crud can one body produce? This is getting ridiculous.

Tonight's movie mash-up selections are Aladdin and The Dark Knight.

I am so sick. It is not getting better and I am a cranky pants.

"Hey DJ, cross me off the list, I can't do the booty contest cause I have to go breastfeed." #WTF U brought a baby? - @MikeySwift

So, there are Tasty Kakes at the Crab Corner. Just a heads up for those looking..

Michael Kors has crazy eyes and I love them!

Thanks for a great dinner, Julie Greer. Great seeing Cori and Jen!

Best. Thing. Ever. Hearing Alex Trebek say "tiny little nipples to France."

Thanks for the yummy lunch and wonderful company, Emily & Nancy!!

Moving my shindig ceremony to Yardhouse. See you fools there!

Tonight. Town Square. 8:30pm. Meet at Texas de Brazil (may be eating elsewhere). Closing ceremonies for Julie-Gras 2011. See you sucka-fishes later.

My bday wish for all of you. Take 5 minutes of your day to tell someone you love them b/c you really never know if this is the last day of your life. Hope everyone realizes & knows true love. I love you all. Thank you for the amazing wake up smiles.

"Son. Son. This is the United States of America. We don't really believe in Miranda anymore." My love for Denny Crane has been reignited.

Thank you everyone for a great weekend. And especially thanks to those that kept their drunken voice mails... LOL...

Ha ha. Time for me and @StacyCarterKat to Jam out with our clams out.

So I lost my favorite pair of OSU sunglasses and my right contact at the lake. :(

Tell me there's some hope for me. I don't wanna be lonely, for the rest of my days on the earth.

Awe-to-the-freaking-some!! I love you, Weezer!

Weezer in 20!

Aw-Yeah suckas... Heading to Weezer in a bit. Can't wait. Perfect way to kick off birthday week...

Two Drinks you should NEVER order:
Yeast Infection - Rum and Milk
Dirty Frenchmen - Red Wine and Olive Juice.

No need to thank me...

Hey Red Rock (@stationcasinos) EFF YOU and your $30 ticket that turns into $45 when you tack on an order fee and an additional ticket fee.

So, I ship a pkg via @FedEx 2 Day & they send it to TN first, then back to LA. What the crap? Do they need a map? A lesson in geography?

The romantic comedy is DEAD. Julia Roberts and Nick Nolte killed it! ~ Jason, Home Movies

Fate is a cruel fate snake with bitter herbs and spices.

“Beat it, Detweiler, the lady’s talking at me!”

"I sooooo informed you thusly." ~ Sheldon

Guess who is home (finally) bizitches!!

Minneapolis looks like a beautiful city. At least is does 20k feet above.

Wow. It's too early. Good-bye vacation. Hello August.

Thanks, Delta. I'm sad that you mucked up my travel but am glad I get to spend another night with Matt. Lol

So humbled standing where our country was born